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Tomas Pain is reported to have said:
If there must be a fight, then let it be in my generation, so that my children can know peace in theirs.
I have been fighting all of my life. In fact conflict is my comfort zone. In 2007 I was diagnosed with dissociative identity disorder (D.I.D. other known as Multiple Personalities). This form of mental illness happens with extreame tramatic events. Your personality fractors to help deal with the event.
Well in the past three years I was been divorced, had an ex-girlfriend murder my child, and I moved in to my last girlfriends house.
Trust me when I tell you it is not easy to deal with the fact that you are constantly being told that you are fabricating when you just don’t remember is not easy. But that is what happens every time I am forced deal with life’s circumstances that I am not able to cope with. I love Nicole and her kids, but I am not handling all the change all at once.
Last night Nicole comes into her bedroom and says to me flat out that she doesn’t know how long she wants me around.
So you aren’t sure how long you want me around? Kind of hard to talk about trust when you are willing to bring strange men into your bed while your kids are in the other room.
You can’t expect some to even care if you trust them when you are willing to compromise that trust that you most likely want in return. almost as soon as we said that we were exclusively seeing eachother Nicole decided to tell me that she wanted an opened relationship. Meaning she wanted me to stay home and babysit white she went out to have sex with other Men. She prefaced it with, “if you have a problem with it, maybe we should rethink our relationship.” Well guess what Nicole, I did rethink our relationship. Have a good life.
I am off the grid with the exception of this website that is bouncing off of 36 different Proxy Servers. With that said, there is no going back. Some think it is disrespectful to hang someone else’s dirty luandry on a blog, but which is more disrespectful? Having a threesome in your bedroom while your oldest son is banging on your bedroom door and yelling at him because you are embarrassed or telling the oldest son the truth about what was happening.
For me I get extremely uncomfortable when I start to feel trapped. My first response is always to find away to escape. Out on the streets of Portland and Vancouver, I have found multitudes of Men who feel the same way. They to are unable to maintain a healthy relationship with any kind of responsibility attached.
I realized that while I still love her and her family, I am better off playing the Rogue I was born to be. My work her at Anarchy fell behind while I was trying to learn to play Dad to 4 wonderful kids. I lost connection with my sources and while I don’t get played for this work, I feel it is my first true love.
These stories are meant to make people think about their own lives and how we can all improve.